This is something that has been proven time and time again in my life, and today I was again reminded of this, but for this let me back up a few months.
In October or November when I first started my journey of finding new work I only applied for two jobs. The first was the job that I am currently doing here in Edmonton for the certification firm. The second was a job that would have sent me overseas - to Libya. As I was pondering the decision I just didn't feel at peace about it, and when I was offered the job to work in Edmonton, I immediately took it, and didn't worry about hearing back from the Libya position.
As we fast forward to today, as I was watching The National with my roommate today, they were talking about the uprisings in Tripoli (where I would have been posted in Libya). It turns out that with these uprisings all of the foreign business people are having to flee. That could have been me. I could have been stuck in the middle of a civil war. Bullets flying by me as I try to leave.
Recently I have had trouble believing that I really register on God's radar. Don't get me wrong, I know that He loves me. I know that He cares for. I know that I am His favorite (and for the record, you are His favorite too). I know all of this, but I don't really deep down believe it some days.
Father,
You are beautiful. Your grace and mercy continue to surpass my understanding. I know not how You - a perfect divine Being - can love a person such as I. I so often can not even find love for myself.
Help me Lord to the place of acceptance. Help me to believe your promises. Let me grab a hold of them and not let go! I see you seated in a pasture, calling for me and waiting for me. I long to exist at your feet and to never leave. Show me the way to remove the barriers between us. Let nothing come between us.
~your child
